The Burdens of being YOUNG---

Today...my ex left the house after spending a whole weekend with me. Normally, this would not be a huge thing...but all weekend, she held me in her arms while I was puking my guts up (every hour or so), telling me how she loved me with all her heart, and making corny jokes as to make me smile.
She even cuddled me to help me sleep...
Now she is going out to the club with a girl that she has a crush on...might get a few drinks, dance the night away, then sleep soundly next to someone else. And I'm at home alone. I dealt with this the last time that we broke up...but now I realized something else...something that had to do with one of my past relationships.

I used to date a girl up in New York who was 3 years younger than me. We had been together for 4-years as an internet-roleplaying-couple who did not really know much about each other. Needless to say, when we decided to make our relationship something a little more serious...there were always complications going on because she was so much younger than I was.
When I was old enough to drink, she wouldnt be...and while I was going to be 18 (at the time), I could go out and do whatever, while she was still bound by her parents rules because she was much too young.

So how does this relate to my current ex? Well, my ex and I are 4 years apart...she is 23 and I am 19 (until march). She is a socialite who likes to go out and have a good time...and while I am somewhat similar...because of my age, I am bound by specific rules.
She can out to clubs with her friends, and she can go to bars to drinks with her buddies and pals...I cannot. She wants to get out and party and drink...and go places where I cannot follow her. Now I kinda know why Gabriela felt like she was just holding back and felt so helpless all of the time when the two of us were dating...because now I am in something of a similar position and it sucks major balls.

I guess another thing that has me down is being single...to have someone love you so much but not want to be with you...it really takes its toll on your heart, you know? I want to be with her so bad...but she just doesn't seem to see eye-to-eye with me.
But all I can do is wait.

Well that's all of my random ranting for now.